Posted in mental health, slice of life, Therapy, Update

Communication breakdown, Its always the same, I’m having a nervous breakdown, Drive me insane! (Sorry for the lack of communication).

Now this is the story all about how
My life got flipped, turned upside down
And I’d like to take a minute just sit right there
I’ll tell you how I became a train wreck

I was doing so well. Was on top of everything, and pushing my self hard. Then the fates stepped in and smacked me back into place. Life got hard. Not “oh man a friend canceled on me” hard but “Hey you’re getting evicted if you don’t come up with $800”  hard. So I do what I always do weather the storm and fight. ended up borrowing some money ($400) from my dad. Easy peasy right. I wish. The Price was almost too much to pay. I love my dad don’t get me wrong. The guy can be an asshole. He spent the 3 hrs I was with him, to tear me down and remind me just how shit, I am, my life is, and how I’m not worth the skin on my back. real fun times. Now I got the money I needed albeit emotionally broken but alive.

Next day I put out that fire. Cue the next level boss. My apartments call me and let me know I need to fill out paperwork or I’m getting evicted if it’s not done by Friday (don’t ask why or what I still have no idea) So I get them what they need and all is good. So it seems. Next day BOOM power goes out on a Friday at 1pm. I didn’t get a notice or anything (that anyone in my house wanted to share with me anyway) again had to borrow money. Ugh, I hate having to do that.  now all emergencies are done I can relax a bit.  Nope.

Anyways the problems after that are much more personal than id like to share atm. That said I’m trying to keep my self-alive. I haven’t forgotten about this. I will be back and Stronger than ever.

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Posted in Art, poetry, Uncategorized

Welcome to the order

The eyes of the swine are upon you
searching for truth, digging for the roots,
That cause such evil inside you.

In the dark they haunt you,
Threw the forest they will find you,
Running away won’t change you
And Starting again wont save you.

Welcome to the order,
Drop down to your knees,
Open up your eyes
And welcome to the time of the swine

Digging through the filth,
Eating at the flesh,
Enter Into the mud,
just like all the rest.

Welcome to the order,
Drop down to your knees,
Open up your eyes
And welcome to the time of the swine

The eyes of the swine are upon you,
Digging for the truth, searching at the roots
For the evil inside me….